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CALMNESS (a.k.a. boredom, familiarity)

My mind is a castle and I am its princess

If only a princess weren’t a lonely job.

My mind is a series of infinite corridors and doors

And the rooms behind those doors

And every piece of furniture in those rooms behind those doors

Off of those corridors.

I’ve memorized every pathway,

Every groove in the walls,

And every blemish in the doors.

My thoughts ebb and flow,

And flow and ebb

And sometimes ebb more than they flow

And vice versa.

My mind is a maze.

Lost in its rhetoric of nothingness

And somethingness,

It doesn’t keep me apprised of the outside world.

(What is it kids are into these days?)

The calmness and monotony quickly escalate to anger when the princess realizes she is trapped.

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ANGER (a.k.a. dissatisfaction, confusion, sadness)

My mind is a source of endless entertainment

That keeps me occupied,

But in actuality, it’s nothing more than trapped.

(Help!)

My mind is a mess

Of unfinished stories,

Expectations delayed,

Freudian slips,

Cryptic messages,

And lingering sentiments.

Books of emotions,

And I bury them all.

Its schizophrenic speculations

And scurrying stimulations

Make it a tiresome task to keep up.

I’ve grown weary.

(I’m here, but my mind is elsewhere.)

I like to go to the rooftop garden and forage.

I once found a cell phone,

But we have no WiFi access here.

What freaking good does that do me?

I use it as a nightlight,

But it usually wakes me up.

(As if anyone can see the bags under my eyes in this

Purgatory of monotony I call

“My place of work.”)

The princess realizes she cannot control her circumstances, so she must control her feelings (inspired by the philosophy of Stocism). Her castle can either be her prison or her paradise — it’s up for her to decide. Ultimately, she decides to get free.

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HAPPINESS (a.k.a. acceptance)

My mind never ceases to amaze me.

Its unlimited creativity

Never renders me spiritless.

(Never may that be!)

I’m wildly inventive,

Unbridledly curious,

Fiercely passionate,

And excessively obsessive.

I sense a change on the horizon,

I can feel it in the wind.

It’s blowing in a zephyr.

No, it’s blowing in a storm.

An opportunity to get free.

Not freedom of the outside,

But the freedom of my mind

That comes from liberating my Jekyll from my Hyde.

A new dawn.

(My moving meditation.)

The shivers are gone as are the

Doubts,

Panics,

Fears,

And dreads.

Yes, I’m crossing the threshold to a new divine.

Deliverance is near.

Deliverance is here.

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A Princess is a Lonely Job

Every little girl wants to be a princess, but did you know that a princess is a lonely job? A princess lives a life of isolation because no one wants to develop a deep relationship with her—she is “royalty” and therefore cannot be touched. The princess stays all day in her castle, longing to be with the people.

I divided the series up into three parts identified by the emotions of calmness, anger, and happiness.

A Princess is a Lonely Job begins with the princess reminiscing about her life. She talks about how her life is seemingly enviable, but in actuality, is quite boring and lonely.

Photography: Micaela Hoo

Model: Abigail VanSteenberghe

Styling: Hannah Kristina Metz

What I Did:

  • Creative Direction
  • Art Direction
  • Photography
  • Writing